So much of our identity is rooted in our appearance. As a black woman, I felt like I’ve often had to change the way I look, to assimilate to white beauty standards. My hair was relaxed or in a protective style ever since I was a young age. Growing up, my curl pattern has never really been embraced or appreciated.

When I was turning 23, I decided to do the big chop and I shaved my head completely. Before I big chopped, I didn't know what my natural hair texture looked like. I decided to go natural not only to learn more about myself but to also finally show appreciation and pride for my hair in its natural state. Going natural has taught me to accept who I am in my rawest and most authentic form. Taking the time to get to know my hair for what it is without any expectations feels like I'm taking the time to get to know myself. Separating and nourishing my little curls and coils fills me with so much gratitude and joy. This journey so far has taught me a sense of vulnerability and ownership. I don't have to match what society deems as beautiful, and I can celebrate what I am as I am. 

As a black woman, I think it's so important for me to show pride in my features and the way I look despite any societal standards. When I was growing up, I found that black was rarely showcased as beautiful in the media. I also found it hard to relate to the black actresses playing characters I would see on TV. The lack of representation and seeing the same kind of woman being photographed as “beautiful” can be draining on any woman that doesn't match the standards, especially at an age where you're struggling to define yourself. Growing up despite being told that I was beautiful by my family, and despite having confident black female role models, it was clear for me to see what society thought a woman should look like, and what society thought of me as a black woman.

Being black will always mean that your appearance comes with a narrative. Defying beauty standards, and choosing to appreciate yourself as you are is a form of activism in a world that subconsciously teaches you that you are not beautiful. Taking care of my natural hair has become apart of my personal growth and self-care in so many ways.